Isn't it time to let go of that therapy taboo?
Updated: Sep 5, 2022
A while back I was on the phone to a colleague, and he mentioned that he wouldn't be available the day after, as he was taking the day off. Living in London, the next question was clearly polite small talk (which of course is not always appropriate and should be asked with caution), i.e. "Oh amazing! Are you doing anything nice?".
Now I either made this colleague feel on the spot and that he had to tell me, or he felt comfortable enough to share, or he just didn't feel like it was a big deal to share, but he ended up telling me that the reason he was taking the day off, was to go and play golf with his brother, as his brother was going through a divorce. This was then followed by the comment "thankfully they don't have kids!"
Therapy is medicine for the soul
I immediately did a test I tend to do with many men.... I said "Oh, has he considered therapy?", and although my colleague didn't seem opposed to the suggestion, he said he would suggest it, but didn't think his brother would be interested, as he doesn't believe in therapy. If I was given a penny for every time I heard someone say (and unfortunately usually men), "I don't believe in therapy" or "I'm not crazy, why would I need therapy", I would have been one very very very wealth woman. I could never understand why there is such a misconception, but know that people are suffering as a result of this belief, stigma and taboo.
I then went on to say something along the lines of, "well I hope he considers it. I truly believe it will help him switch his perception, as unfortunately otherwise future relationships will most probably be a repetition of the past ones if he doesn't heal!" And then continued on to say "If only people knew the good that could come in the future, they would be throwing more divorce parties than wedding parties!." Now before you get annoyed with that statement, please bear with me, so I can make my point. Clearly I don't think that divorce is a happy event to celebrate. What I do think though is that in the era we were raised (I will elaborate further down), many of us do not choose emotionally secure partners, but instead ones who trigger us. So if that's the case, when your marriage does end, if you take the right steps to heal - with therapy being one of those steps - then it can be the best f**king thing that ever happened to you!
I then continued the discussion and to be completely honest, at the beginning had no clue what I was saying.... but it all made sense as I heard myself saying it, so I will write it here on this post in case it makes sense to you too. But before I do, I need to ask; do you too catch yourself talking about something and feel like you have no idea who is talking, only to discover you make absolute sense of what you hear coming out of your